What You Need to Know About Emotional Affairs and Infidelity
An emotional affair is a relationship characterized by intimacy and emotional involvement between an individual and someone other than their official partner. Emotional affairs can be just as damaging as sexual affairs. Here is what you need to know about the stages of emotional affairs and infidelity.
The majority of unfaithful partners fail to recognize how a platonic friendship can evolve rather quickly into an emotional and sexual relationship.
Stages of an Emotional Affair
1. Platonic friends
Many, if not most, emotional affairs occur between friends that were once platonic. This type of friendship may have not started with the intention of becoming an emotional affair, however evolved into something more than a friendship.
2. Dissatisfaction with primary relationship
If an individual is dissatisfied in their primary relationship, they may seek comfort in their friend. This can lead to a deeper connection between friends, leading to stage 3.
3. Intimate friendship/insecure marriage
Boundaries between friends soon dissolve, and the moment when the friendship became too intimate is hard to distinguish. Here are some ways to identify this stage:
- Sharing things with the friend that is not being shared with your partner
- Friend sharing details about their life that they do not share with other friends
- Looking forward to talking to the friend
- Often thinking of your friend
- Looking forward to sharing events of your life with your friend
- Hiding the friendship from your partner
- Avoiding other colleagues/friends when you are meeting with your intimate friend.
In stage 3, the friendship begins to cause problems in the marriage by creating a bond stronger with your friend than with your partner.
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4. Deciding-for-each-other
This stage is characterized by an individual consulting their friend for important life decisions. This will hurt your official partner and relationship because all important decisions will be made excluding them.
5. Cribbing
In the cribbing stage, an individual might complain to their “friend” about their official partner. This becomes the norm, and an individual does not mind telling their friend about the inadequacies of their relationship/marriage.
6. Emotional Affairs/Emotionally Detached Marriage
At this point, the friendship has evolved into a relationship, and is a secret relationship with sexual chemistry. Some signs that the friendship has evolved into an emotional affair:
- You are sexually excited in the presence of your friend
- You feel happier with your friend than with your spouse
- Meetings with your friend are done in secret
- You are becoming more emotionally distant with your official partner
- You become easily annoyed and indifferent towards your official partner
7. Sexually Intimate Affair/Threatened Marriage
An emotional affair reaches this stage when it becomes sexual.
Related: My Husband Got Another Woman Pregnant: What to Do
Contact Us
If you have any more questions about the stages of emotional affairs and infidelity’s effect on divorce, contact us. We’ll get you in touch with the most qualified attorney for your unique legal matter. If infidelity was involved in your marriage, we can get you in touch with one of our California Divorce Attorneys.