7 Things to Do If Your Husband Says He Wants a Divorce

What To Do When Your Husband Says He Wants a Divorce

It’s not surprising that you may feel lost or confused when your husband wants a divorce. Here are 7 things to do if your husband says he wants a divorce.

After your husband tells you he wants a divorce, you should:

Not beg him to stay
Not make things more complicated than they need to be
Avoid making demands
Ask him if fixing the marriage is an option
Be the best version of yourself
Lawyer up

It may be hard for you to handle the concept of divorce so soon after your husband asks for it. Bringing up divorce is a big step in marriage. A couple can either solve their issues and continue their marriage, or decide it’s time to move on.

1. Don’t beg him to stay.

The single biggest mistake a wife can make when her husband says he wants a divorce is to beg him to stay. You’ll only push him farther. Chances are your husband put some thought into this and already mentally prepared himself for a divorce, so begging him to stay may make it seem like you’re two steps behind. He won’t like it, and you’ll seem pathetic.

But, you should not leave the home if he asks you to (unless domestic violence is present). Once one spouse moves out, it can become much harder to save the marriage. Also, if you live out of the marital home for a certain period of time you may not be entitled to it when dividing property during your divorce. If your husband doesn’t want to live with you anymore, he can move out, not you.

2. Don’t make things complicated.

If you feel that some of your own actions have caused your marriage to get to this point, stop them immediately. Try to recognize your role in straining the marriage. This isn’t about what you’ve done or what he’s done, it’s about what both of you can do to create a brighter future. Don’t act up, nag, or do anything out of spite,. Focus on fixing the marriage rather than placing blame on him or yourself.

3. Avoid making demands.

Your husband has probably been under a lot of pressure, which definitely played a role in his decision to bring up divorce. This is not the time to set boundaries or tell him what he’s done wrong: this is the time to listen, comprehend, reflect, and respond. He’ll appreciate if you listen to what he’s saying rather than think of your next response. Hear him out, and be reasonable in your replies.

4. Ask him if fixing the marriage is an option.

After you’ve heard what he’s had to say, it’s time for you to reflect. After deeply acknowledging was he says, ask him if he’s willing to work with you to fix your marriage. Both of you have invested your lives into building this, so it’s fair to ask if he’s fully committed to getting a divorce. But, asking if he’s open to the idea is not the same thing as forcing it on him. If he’s set on leaving, chances are that you can’t stop him. Recognize this and work towards being the best version of yourself.

5. Be the best version of yourself.

Look inwards. Consider the actions you’ve taken for your marriage to get to this point, and how you can avoid making the same mistakes. Find satisfaction with yourself, and for yourself. If your husband recognizes this, he’s more likely to be interested in scrapping the idea of a divorce. If not, you’ve become more content as a person and will be more accepting of this change.

6. Lawyer up.

Just because you speak to a divorce lawyer does not mean you’re getting a divorce. A lawyer can help you review your options. If your husband is set on getting a divorce, then you should definitely get in touch with an experienced divorce attorney.

7. Contact Us

At Her Lawyer, we are dedicated to helping women get through divorce. Our passionate attorneys can explain your rights and the steps you should take to lead a better life post-divorce.

If your husband says he wants a divorce and you need a lawyer, contact us. We’ll get you in touch with the right attorney for your needs and preferences. Your first consultation is free. We’re here for you 24/7.